Procrastination

Do you think that serial procrastination is some form of illness?? I definitely suffer from it. THE THING IS… I actually do care about my work, my degree, my marks and I actually like what I study (most of the time). Yet when it comes to doing the essay it all falls down in disaster. I always get it done (sometimes in tears, kicking, screaming and suffering attacks of anger and violence :P) and get marks that average around credit to distinction but to be honest it is not even a fraction of the best I could be capable of. This frustrates me and I hate having assignments hanging over my head and I do sit at my computer and I read and I study but still nothing happens. It’s not like a case of ‘can’t be bothered’. It is because of this that I have come to the conclusion that there must be more to it. Seriously! I am right now avoiding finishing an assignment that is due this Wednesday and although I find it interesting and I don’t even mind writing it at all, I JUST CAN’T!! I mean WTF!?? Maybe I have something else wrong with me?? Do other people suffer from this?? 

I don’t come from a academic family particularly but it is probably a lot down to my Dad that I am even at uni. Although not an academic by name I think he could match it with a few. I like the way he talks about the world and I would regard him as quite intellectual. So NO it’s not like I am from some uneducated dump. Having said that I went to a rural bogan high school that was ridiculously full of idiots which I found at best frustrating. I never really learnt how to work under pressure because there never was any. I didn’t really have to extend my mind very far and spent most of my time being praised as ‘extremely intelligent, mature, witty and some how gifted’ in actuality as it has come to light over the past few years of my life it was probably more that I was surrounded by people that were unintelligent, highly immature and totally witless. It depresses me somewhat that I didn’t have the opportunity to go somewhere better (sorry mum and dad) because I wonder how much better I would have been now….?? Anyway that aside, could this effect my ability to cope in the academic world? Maybe. 

I don’t find the work particularly difficult and I understand most concepts with ease even in some of my more challenging subjects. I seem to be able to write well (when I can actually write). It’s just that these moments of being able to just sit and do the work are few and far between and cause unnecessary distress and general awfulness. 

Anyone who has all the answers to life (or at least my issues) will be rewarded with my permission to shot Alan Jones who is right now on my TV elevating my already significantly unhealthy blood pressure. Arse Hat. 

Time can be a major inconvenience.

So its been a while since I Tumblr’d. So much stuff happens all the time. Time always goes so fast. Do you notice that? A very great friend of mine who I haven’t seen in over a year was down in Tassie for a couple of weeks and when I saw her we talked and she said this somewhere along the line of our conversation “Today you are older than you have ever been and the youngest that you will ever be.” This was two weeks ago when she told me that she would be here for 2 more weeks and we said we would see each other again, and go out and have a night of beers, or just chill at my flat. But we never did, and now she has gone back. See what I mean about time? And that quote, the way time passes us, as humans. Just have to roll with it I suppose.